ok well.. i tink i m back to the normal ed.. dun wanna tink too much liao.. study more important now.. i tink i m giving myself too much pressure these sem.. but i reallie still quite blur wif things going on in sch.. sometimes i tot i understand.. but when our lect give us some questions to do.. i will hesitate if i m rite or not.. i dun like tat feeling...
todae class starts at 1pm.. sleep quite early last nite.. missed the "guess" show again.. dunno how mani weeks nv watch liao.. coz tuesdae is juz a very long day.. 8am to 6pm.. machiam like working like tat.. working oso nv work for 10hrs lar.. tired one leh.. somemore sometimes still must bring laptop to sch.. so heavy.. tat makes tuesdae even worst..
new yr coming liao.. eve going where? maybe stay home study abit or maybe going out wif my ite best fren, zhiwei go tok tok or pah billiard.. tink that will bring us together into the next yr.. hope next yr will be better.. last yr was ok lar.. ORD, good grades for poly in first sem, found a gf, able to live till now, met wif some accidents, no money, win some n lose some frens etc etc.. haha
my wish for new yr will be carry on getting on good grades, more money, win more frens, no more accidents and all the good things lar.. dun fall sick, dun die, family peace, world peace and lastly relationship peace(need that alot).. ok thats abt it..
happy new year 2005.
how come recently so mani pple or shall i sae passerby come to my blog arh? but nvm.. u guys are always welcome..
recently.. as usual, still nothing better to do will quarrel wif gf.. tat thursdae morning nearly broke up.. she asked me shall we seperate for awhile.. she is sick of quarreling wif me, so do i? actually shall we reallie break up or seperate for a moment? i reallie dunno.. actuallie i tink we should.. coz as wat she always sae no pt like tat or shall i sae always like tat.. we going to reach no where if this carries on n on n on.. but i cannot imagine my life without her.. i will go completely down.. she loves me? i dunno.. coz i ask her that question juz now.. she sae she reallie dunno if i love her..
her parrot or bird died juz now.. or duno recently when, she was sad, she was down, so was i.. i was there, wanted to share her down n sorrow.. she ask me to leave her alone.. wat can i do? ok yes.. leave her alone.. she happy now? i dunno.. coz i lessen her burden to quarrel wif me again.. maybe i m juz an ass looking for quarreling all the time.. y m i like that? i dunno.. call the doctor.. i be there soon..
realie wanted to share her problems, ups n down, but.. i tink my past record ain that good, so she rejected that offer.. i m feeling sad now.. who knows? listening to love songs now.. makes me feel like crying.. can i cry? no i cant.. man shudnt cry.. how i wish this is so private.. juz for myself to read.. i know this dun look the usual way i behave in sch or aniwhere.. but this is juz me.. i m human.. i do feel sad sometimes, a shoulder to lean on.. junna can i borrow yours? i know u will give it to me when u r in good mood.. but when u r not?
so mani pple feel like dying these daes.. zhiwei.. one of my best fren.. he told me no pt living animore.. coz there is no meaning in live.. we are born, get old, get sick, n die.. so might as well go earlier.. wat for work so hard everyone? all this stress wun be there.. my gf.. threaten to kill herself if i dun call her tat nite.. y that? is anithing that serious? juz a fonecall n if its not there.. bye bye she goes..
she reallie dunno i had this phobia? my ex died in the sucide manner.. she used that 5 or 6 times.. i cant remember.. so when is the real one? the next dae i got a call from my ex's dad.. he told me she killed herself.. her fren hated me to the core.. but we peace things off after that.. i was sad super sad.. that was extreme.. no one's been there.. so y my gf keep telling me she wanna kill herself.. can u please live for yourself.. not for anione.. she told me she is very tired.. tired of everything.. i give her a chance to leave me completely.. is not that i dun love her animore.. i love her too much.. till i m going crazy.. i m going to burst up.. anione knows? no one knows.. but now.. everyone knows..
i m tired..
juz got my laptop back todae.. hard disk spoil.. so its being replaced.. no charges at all, lucky.. hehe.. at last the tick tick tick sound of the hard disk.. is gone.. peace to my ears.. but after i get back my this laptop.. i m like kinda stranger wif it.. was wif this laptop for like 6mths liao.. den come back.. all the data all gone.. very sianz.. now i m trying to download back all the programs i've got last time.. but all the pics i took all gone.. cannot retrieve liao.. sianz..
still waiting for my bursary money to come.. 1k leh.. dunno when will get.. or shud i sae dunno will get or not.. realie very broke liao.. if it nv comes, i tink i will perish n die.. juz now my dad went to open the mailbox.. saw alot of my letters.. tot they were the bursary thing.. but.. letter from np leh.. ask me go collect award.. wah lan.. buey sianz.. i want money i dun wan award.. all this award oni grow all the spider webs on my table.. if paper one nvm lar.. if those like trophy one.. dun wan lar.. aniway i want money.. ahaha
lucky i m juz in time for the last yr of ers, still can get 350bucks.. if not reallie kong jing liao.. this sem kinda tough.. got this one module.. seriously duno wat the hack the lect is toking.. trying very hard to read up myself.. but still cannot catch the ball.. this cannot goes on.. i wanna get good grade.. so tat next time can get good job.. pls.. god help me abit.. although i dun believe in you.. please.. thanks..
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